{"id":1861,"date":"2020-09-08T09:51:57","date_gmt":"2020-09-08T08:51:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/?p=1861"},"modified":"2023-03-23T16:49:42","modified_gmt":"2023-03-23T16:49:42","slug":"uk-top-sex-noises-revealed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/uk-top-sex-noises-revealed\/","title":{"rendered":"Sex noises: Brits\u2019 favourite sex sounds in the bedroom revealed"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul style=\"font-size: 20px;\">\n<li><b>Moaning is the sexiest noise for 33% of men and 34% of women<\/b><\/li>\n<li><strong>Silence in the bedroom is the top sex sound turn-off for 28% of men and 20% of women<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em>&#8220;Are you done?&#8221;<\/em> Is the biggest turn-off for 24% of men<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Are you a moaner or a screamer? Do you enjoy <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/uk-phone-sex-habits-revealed\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">dirty talk<\/a>, or are you a silent lover?<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The sex noises and sounds people make while experiencing <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/escort\/gb\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual pleasure<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> vary and can reveal a lot about a person.<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br \/>\n<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To get a better understanding of sex noises, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Vivastreet<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> surveyed <\/span><b>nearly 2,000 <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Brits to discover which sounds and words people like and don\u2019t like to hear during sex.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>Here\u2019s what the data revealed about our sex sound turn-ons and turn-offs.<\/b><\/p>\n<h2><b>The sex noises Brits like to hear in bed<\/b><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">According to the results, we Brits are a bunch of moaners, with survey findings revealing<\/span> <b>34% of women, and 33% of men like to hear moaning sounds during intimacy<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. <\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1871 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-ons.jpg\" alt=\"Statistics of top sex sounds for men and women in the UK\" width=\"1536\" height=\"1225\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-ons.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-ons-300x239.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-ons-1024x817.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-ons-768x613.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-ons-600x479.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1536px) 100vw, 1536px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Although moaning during sex could be seen as a device to <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/best-sex-positions-to-spice-up-your-sex-life\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">amp up the bedroom<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and reassure your partner they are satisfying you sexually, according to sex experts, there\u2019s more to this than meets the eye.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Certified Somatic Sex Educator <\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/consciousbliss.co.uk\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Becky Price<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> believes that moaning is the nation\u2019s top sex noise for its deep sound.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">She says that \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">deeper sounds vibrate lower in the body (both for the person making the sound and for the person hearing it) and thus can connect with and enhance our physical arousal<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Perhaps that would explain why only <\/span><b>13% of women and 10% of men enjoyed the sounds of screaming, and even fewer like to hear <\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">squeaking during sex. <\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>Dirty talk and heavy breathing<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The findings also revealed the love for a particular <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/uk-top-sexual-fetishes\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sexual fetish<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> amongst Brits, with talking dirty being the second favourite sex noise to tickle peoples\u2019 pickle. Around <b>22% of women, and 23% of men admitted to enjoying dirty talk and erotic conversations during sex<\/b>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Becky believes that those who love dishing a <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/uk-top-sexual-fetishes-top-kinks-explained\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">kink<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> like dirty talk need or want to feel a mental connection with their partner. &#8220;<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The more connected you feel during sex, the more loved, comfortable and safe you feel with your partner, which can lead to a greater bond<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex and Relationship Coach <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/sexschoolforgrownups.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Alison Pilling<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> points out that: \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Talking dirty is a way of expressing our desires, sharing who we are, and getting to know each other<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When we hear words like \u2018May I nibble your ear?\u2019, or requests like \u2018Would you slowly stroke the inside of my thighs\u2019 or \u2018Mmm that feels nice but slow down a bit\u2019, we\u2019re getting feedback and consent, offering us guidance, reassurance and clarity.<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201d<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1878 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/alison-pilling-on-talking-dirty.png\" alt=\"Sex and Relationship Coach Alison Pilling discusses the effects of talking dirty in the bedroom\" width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/alison-pilling-on-talking-dirty.png 1080w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/alison-pilling-on-talking-dirty-300x169.png 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/alison-pilling-on-talking-dirty-1024x576.png 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/alison-pilling-on-talking-dirty-768x432.png 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/alison-pilling-on-talking-dirty-600x338.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Certified Sexological Bodyworker and Relationship Coach, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/thefeelinstitute.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sue Sutherland<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, supports this theory of the link between sex, communication and connection, stressing that not only can this type of communication during sex be \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">intimate and hot, it\u2019s also a way to stay connected<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In third place, the survey revealed that <\/span><b>19% of women and 16% of men get turned on by hearing the breath of their partner<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Heavy breathers during sex are \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">connected to their body and able to use their breathing to enhance or stimulate their pleasure,<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&#8220;<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0says Becky.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><b>What Brits DON\u2019T like to hear in bed<\/b><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have you ever heard of the phrase \u2018awkward silence\u2019? Yes, it seems that this is one of the top sex fears for Brits, with <\/span><b>20% of women and 28% of men admitting to not liking the sound, or more importantly the lack of, during sexual intercourse<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. <\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1872 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-offs.jpg\" alt=\"Statistics of least favourite sounds for men and women in the UK\" width=\"1536\" height=\"1224\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-offs.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-offs-300x239.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-offs-1024x816.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-offs-768x612.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-turn-offs-600x478.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1536px) 100vw, 1536px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But why? According to <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Becky<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">so much of human communication is verbal we can feel very disconcerted when the person we are with is silent. If they speak or make sounds, we know they are present with us, not drifting off, thinking about what to cook for dinner, work or the email they haven\u2019t sent yet, etc.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">She continues to say that, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">making noise or speaking, it&#8217;s part connecting and being in the experience together<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s important to know that silence during sex doesn\u2019t necessarily mean that you\u2019re not enjoying the experience.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Becky says, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you think about it, most of us first learn about arousal and orgasm through <\/span><\/i><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/9-things-to-know-about-masturbation\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">masturbation<\/span><\/i><\/a><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> when we are living at home. Many men and women, therefore learn to be quick and quiet. These habits get set, and it can be difficult to change. Both men and women can have problems making noise when they are having difficulty feeling aroused and\/or coming to orgasm. They can become so focused on \u2019trying\u2019 to get their body to act in the right way, that all their attention is on their genitals. Making noise can feel like a big distraction for them.\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1879 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/dr-claudia-six-on-orgasms.png\" alt=\"Clinical Sexologist Dr Claudia Sex discusses the relationship between personality and response to orgasms\" width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/dr-claudia-six-on-orgasms.png 1080w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/dr-claudia-six-on-orgasms-300x169.png 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/dr-claudia-six-on-orgasms-1024x576.png 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/dr-claudia-six-on-orgasms-768x432.png 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/dr-claudia-six-on-orgasms-600x338.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the other hand, making noises or not during sex can be linked to personality traits. According to Clinical Sexologist <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/drsix.net\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dr Claudia Six<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">quiet people generally are quieter about their orgasms, just like people who are loud in life are loud in bed<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d Also, silence during sex isn\u2019t uncommon for those that are sexually repressed: \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">they will hold their breath and thus their vocalisations when climaxing<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>Faking pleasure\u00a0<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But hearing sounds during sex doesn\u2019t always mean that your partner is enjoying the experience. Research has shown that many women, in particular, exaggerate noises to fake <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/what-is-an-orgasm-and-how-to-get-one\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">orgasms<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Becky warns that \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">making noise can be a way of pretending either to yourself and\/or your partner that you are having a good time. This is probably more the case for women, and particularly when they are faking an orgasm.&#8221;<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1880 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/becky-price-on-sexual-pleasure.png\" alt=\"Certified Somatic Sex Educator Becky Price talks on making noises in the bedroom\" width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/becky-price-on-sexual-pleasure.png 1080w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/becky-price-on-sexual-pleasure-300x169.png 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/becky-price-on-sexual-pleasure-1024x576.png 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/becky-price-on-sexual-pleasure-768x432.png 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/becky-price-on-sexual-pleasure-600x338.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">there are also times when the freedom to be silent can be beautiful. I think this is particularly when people are practising a more relaxed and lengthy approach to sex, there are times when you can just be in wonder at the beautiful feelings and no words or noises are necessary<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Supporting the fact that no verbal sound is needed during sex, Dr Claudia says that the sounds of the act of sex itself <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">or the \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">slapping\u2019 sound of impact as it does so, are not to be overlooked as powerful sexual sounds.\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<h2><b>The great gender divide\u00a0<\/b><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Interestingly, when comparing the responses to sex noises more closely between men and women, there were some noticeable similarities<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> For instance, moaning, talking dirty, and heavy breathing ranked first, second and third for both sexes. <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br \/>\n<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br \/>\n<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Looking into their sex fears there were some differences. <\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>Top sex sound fears<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Taking a further look into the sounds men and women hate to hear, the results were interesting for each gender.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1874 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-fears-1.jpg\" alt=\"Statistics of the worst sex sounds for men and women in the UK\" width=\"1536\" height=\"1353\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-fears-1.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-fears-1-300x264.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-fears-1-1024x902.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-fears-1-768x677.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-sex-sound-fears-1-600x529.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1536px) 100vw, 1536px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Saying the wrong name<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> was the worst thing for women to hear during sex. In heterosexual relationships, women are the ones being penetrated, and this is an emotionally big deal for most women. \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Allowing someone into your core matters to most, and having someone else\u2019s name uttered is usually incredibly disrespectful and hurtful,<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201d says Sue.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex, Pleasure &amp; Intimacy Coach <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.sarahrosebright.co.uk\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sarah Rose Bright<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> agrees: \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When you are intimate with someone you are at your most vulnerable and hearing your partner call somebody else\u2019s name, especially an ex can feel like an insult or it can seem that your partner&#8217;s attention is elsewhere<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1881 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sarah-rose-bright-on-saying-the-wrong-name.png\" alt=\"Sex, Pleasure and Intimacy Coach Sarah Rose Bright discusses the effect of saying the wrong name during sex\" width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sarah-rose-bright-on-saying-the-wrong-name.png 1080w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sarah-rose-bright-on-saying-the-wrong-name-300x169.png 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sarah-rose-bright-on-saying-the-wrong-name-1024x576.png 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sarah-rose-bright-on-saying-the-wrong-name-768x432.png 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sarah-rose-bright-on-saying-the-wrong-name-600x338.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, although it may be hard to accept for many, this may not always be the case. While many might suspect that their partner has feelings or is fantasising about someone else, Sarah believes that \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">when you are in a heightened state of arousal, it is natural that memories can arise spontaneously<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><br \/>\n<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><b>Great expectations<\/b><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In stark contrast, <\/span><b>the number one worst thing men could hear during sex was \u2018<\/b><b><i>Are you done?\u2019<\/i><\/b><b> with 24% admitting that to be their top sex noise turn off between the sheets<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u2018Is that it<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">?\u2019 came in second for men. <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are these expressions linked to performance anxiety? \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Of course they are,<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201d says Becky.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s not surprising why these expressions are the worst to hear for men, as Becky believes that they are both very dismissive phrases that suggest that their partner is not connected to them. &#8220;\u2018<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Are you done yet?\u2019 indicates that your partner is bored and just wants you to hurry up, placing pressure on you to have an ejaculatory orgasm as soon as possible<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201d whereas &#8220;\u2018<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">is that it<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">?\u2019 <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">indicates disappointment that what you did wasn\u2019t good enough or for long enough<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-1884\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/elaine-young-sex-performance-anxiety.png\" alt=\"Somatic Sex Educator Elaine Young on sex performance anxiety in men\" width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/elaine-young-sex-performance-anxiety.png 1080w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/elaine-young-sex-performance-anxiety-300x169.png 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/elaine-young-sex-performance-anxiety-1024x576.png 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/elaine-young-sex-performance-anxiety-768x432.png 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/elaine-young-sex-performance-anxiety-600x338.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">She adds that both the phrases<\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">indicate<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u201cthere is a focus on achieving \u2018good enough\u2019 sex, rather than having a loving intimate and fun time together<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Alison further reinforces the link between mens\u2019 preferred sex sounds and performance anxiety, stating that \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There can be a lot of performance anxiety during sex, men worrying about <\/span><\/i><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/how-to-cure-erectile-dysfunction-at-home\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">maintaining their erection<\/span><\/i><\/a><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or arousal, thinking about whether they\u2019re \u2018doing it right\u2019 or techniques. Much of this confusion about intimacy and sex can be minimised by wonderful communication throughout the time, rather than just in the last few seconds<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The pressures of men to perform in the bedroom is something Somatic Sex Coach <a href=\"https:\/\/www.thetantricshaman.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">Elaine Young<\/a> says is linked to society, where men are &#8220;<em>often told by society and pornography they have to be the one &#8216;doing&#8217;, that they should be able to sustain an erection always or able to make love for a certain amount of time<\/em>.&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It seems that for both men and women, a toilet break is enough to kill the moment. <b>Around 15% of men and 16% of women revealed that hearing <\/b><b><i>\u2018I need to go to the toilet\u2019<\/i><\/b><b> was the third-worst thing to hear during sex<\/b>. <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But according to Alison, it should be seen \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">as simply a pause in pleasure &#8211; a time to breathe, relax and regroup<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d Most importantly, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">the more we can do to feel safe and relaxed in intimacy, even if it means a loo break, the greater our experience can be. Pauses help to move us to break the idea that sex is a conveyor belt with a fixed starting and endpoint. Moving away from a focus of orgasm to a focus of connection allows more variety and fun, creating a sense of togetherness rather than performance<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><b><\/b><b>Brits go-to orgasm word<\/b><b><br \/>\n<\/b><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The top words climaxed to saw slight differences between men and women. For women, \u2018<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ohhhhhhhhhhh\u2019<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> proved to be the number one go-to orgasm word for 21% of respondents. This was followed by \u2018<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Don\u2019t stop!<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u2019, with 19% eager to reach orgasm. When it comes to expressing our favourite orgasm words, it appears that we may have outside influences. According to Sarah, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How we do sex can result from habits that we pick up along the way, whether from watching the movies or porn or with partners<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1875 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-orgasm-word.jpg\" alt=\"Statistics of favourite orgasm word for men and women in the UK\" width=\"1536\" height=\"1372\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-orgasm-word.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-orgasm-word-300x268.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-orgasm-word-1024x915.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-orgasm-word-768x686.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/uk-top-orgasm-word-600x536.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1536px) 100vw, 1536px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Men\u2019s go-to orgasm word on the other hand was <em>\u2018<\/em><\/span><em><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I\u2019m coming<\/span><\/em><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><em>\u2019<\/em> (32%). \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I think some men say that \u2018I\u2019m coming\u2019 as an announcement as it may have an impact on their partner in how they want to receive the ejaculation, i.e, they may or may not want it inside them<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">,\u201d Sarah continues.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">However, Alison explains that \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">hearing these precious words can offer reassurance and relaxation, a feeling of satisfaction and connection.<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201d<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For Sue,<\/span> <span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">it\u2019s more \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">about what the goal of sex is.\u201d She argues that \u201cmost people will say when the man comes, penetrative sex is over. For many, it is the most pressurised and performative aspect of sex. Don\u2019t come too quickly, don\u2019t take too long, don\u2019t lose your erection. So \u2018I\u2019m coming\u2019 can be a signpost, a warning and an achievement all in one!<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Interestingly <\/span><b>&#8216;<\/b><b><i>I love you<\/i><\/b><b>&#8216; was the least likely go-to orgasm word for men, with just 3% saying it was their orgasm word of choice<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> If sex is associated with love, connection \u2026.how can that be? According to Becky, this is not a surprise. She goes on to say that \u201c<em>f<\/em><\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">or most men, if they want to have an ejaculatory orgasm they focus on bringing all the energy into their genitals, thoughts of the heart would be a distraction.<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><b>Finding your authentic sex sound\u00a0<\/b><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Whichever sex noise you use during sexual intercourse, it\u2019s important to know that all sex sounds are <\/span><b>normal<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. For Sue, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">often people use noises as a way to signal they are having a good time, to encourage their partner to climax, because they think they should or should not<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">People enjoy hearing levels of sound from their partner because it\u2019s arousing \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">and at the very least, one likes to know what one is doing to one\u2019s lover is effective and producing the desired results<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">,\u201d adds Dr Claudia.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But for Sarah, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">there is no such thing as normal when it comes to human sexuality! We like to think there is a \u2019normal\u2019 that we fit into, but we are all so unique<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But not everybody feels comfortable to express themselves during sex. When with your partner, Sue advises that couples should openly ask each other whether making noises is something they enjoy. \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can make it a game. Remembering to have fun, and adding some animal noises or funny phrases can be brilliant<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-1885 aligncenter\" src=\"https:\/\/vivastreetuk.wpengine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sue-sutherland-on-sex-noises.png\" alt=\"Certified Sexological Bodyworker &amp; Relationship Coach Sue Sutherland discusses why people make noise during sex\" width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sue-sutherland-on-sex-noises.png 1080w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sue-sutherland-on-sex-noises-300x169.png 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sue-sutherland-on-sex-noises-1024x576.png 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sue-sutherland-on-sex-noises-768x432.png 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/09\/sue-sutherland-on-sex-noises-600x338.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/p>\n<h2><b>How to find your sex sound<\/b><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re looking to find your authentic sound in the bedroom, the key thing is to \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">communicate<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201d, says Sue, while Alison believes it\u2019s about being \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">authentic in life, feeling relaxed within whomever you go to bed with, feeling<\/span><\/i> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">brave to be open and vulnerable with your partne<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">r.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Understanding each other sexually is always better than faking pleasure, as this can be quite disheartening, and it may be more noticeable than you think. \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We can all tell fake or porn-y noises from the real thing, no one feels good about that<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">,\u201d she continues.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So, even though sex noises are arousing, never feel pressured to make them if it\u2019s not genuine. Overall, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">being truthful and brave adds to the magic of authentic sounds<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d\u00a0 However, if you\u2019re a silent lover, exploring sex noises can really change the pleasure you experience.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you are the one to make sex noises during intimacy, \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">making sound is a really important part of pleasure and stopping noise prevents pleasure from fully moving through the body,<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">&#8220;<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u00a0says Sarah.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But those that express themselves verbally during sex might be having a better experience in the bedroom than those who do not. Alison believes\u00a0 that \u201c<\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">using your voice to ask for sensual, nurturing touch all over your body (not just in the T-Zones) will send you into a real rapture<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It seems as though no matter the sex sound, it\u2019s communication that makes us feel connected to those we are intimately engaging with.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Moaning is the sexiest noise for 33% of men and 34% of women Silence in the bedroom is the top sex sound turn-off for 28% of men and 20% of women &#8220;Are you done?&#8221; Is the biggest turn-off for 24% of men Are you a moaner or a screamer? Do you enjoy dirty talk, or [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1868,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":true,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"CBBTypography":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[223],"tags":[],"yst_prominent_words":[],"class_list":["post-1861","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sex-and-relationships"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1861","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1861"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1861\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1868"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1861"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1861"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1861"},{"taxonomy":"yst_prominent_words","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/yst_prominent_words?post=1861"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}