{"id":5006,"date":"2024-03-08T12:11:27","date_gmt":"2024-03-08T12:11:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/?p=5006"},"modified":"2024-03-13T09:35:49","modified_gmt":"2024-03-13T09:35:49","slug":"what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session\/","title":{"rendered":"What to do if someone you know books an escort session"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>It\u2019s exciting when a booking message appears in your inbox. But this excitement can quickly turn sour if you know the person from your \u201c<a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/what-is-vanilla-sex\/\">vanilla life<\/a>\u201d.<\/p>\n<p>Today, we\u2019re exploring what you should do if someone you know tries to book an escort session. From navigating a rejection with grace to setting firm boundaries, we\u2019re looking at all your options.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"#whattodo?\">What do you do when someone you know contacts you for escort services?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#howtorejectthem\">How to politely reject someone you know<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#ifyouwanttogoforit\">What to do if you want to go for it<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#whatiftheysubscribetoyouronlyfans\">What if someone you know subscribes to your OnlyFans<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"#thetakeaway\">The takeaway<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><em>Scroll down to get started. <\/em><\/p>\n<h2 id=\"whattodo?\"><strong>What do you do when someone you know contacts you for escort services?<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>So, you\u2019ve opened up your inbox and found a message from someone you know outside of sex work. Whether it\u2019s an old acquaintance, a colleague, or a friend, this can be a very uncomfortable position for escorts &#8211; especially if you\u2019re not open about your profession.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Here are a few tips to help you navigate the situation and work out whether you want to take the booking<\/em><\/strong>:<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stop and take a deep breath<\/span><\/h3>\n<p>First, stop and take a deep breath. It\u2019s easy to make an impulsive decision after seeing a familiar face in your messages.<\/p>\n<p>But instead of sending an emotional message, walk away from your phone or laptop and let your thoughts settle. Before you respond, you need to think about what you want to do with a cool and calm mind.<\/p>\n<p>Some deep breaths or a fast-paced walk outside are helpful in this situation. So, use your <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/overcoming-burnout-as-a-sex-worker\/\">self-care techniques<\/a> to achieve a relaxed state.<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Consider your gut reaction<\/span><\/h3>\n<p>Reflect on your gut reaction once you\u2019ve taken a few moments to chill. Does the message make you feel sick? Or is there something slightly exciting about the idea of meeting someone you know?<\/p>\n<p>Typically, your gut reaction depends on how well you know the punter and whether people you know in real life understand your career.<\/p>\n<p>If your instant reaction was a NO, it\u2019s best not to push yourself into seeing them. However, if you feel a pull towards taking the session, there are a few more questions to ask yourself.<\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">How well do you know them?<\/span><\/h3>\n<p>There\u2019s a big difference between an old acquaintance and someone you see everyday. If there\u2019s a chance the punter genuinely doesn\u2019t recognise you from the past, you\u2019re probably okay to do the session.<\/p>\n<p>However, if you see them weekly and their request for a session is out of the blue, you might want to consider how it\u2019ll affect your relationship going forward.<\/p>\n<p><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-5009\" src=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-1.png\" alt=\"young couple on a dinner date\" width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-1.png 1080w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-1-300x169.png 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-1-1024x576.png 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-1-768x432.png 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-1-600x338.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Think about the future<\/span><\/h3>\n<p>Likewise, you should also think about how taking the session will <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/sex-work-and-future-job-opportunities\/\">affect you in the future<\/a>. If you\u2019re discreet about your career and don\u2019t want certain people to find out, it might be best to avoid taking bookings from people you know.<\/p>\n<p>It might not affect you if you\u2019re open about your career and the punter doesn\u2019t make you uncomfortable. But remember, mixing business and your personal life isn\u2019t always advised.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"\u201dhowtorejectthem&quot;\"><strong>How to politely reject someone you know<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>If you\u2019ve decided that you don\u2019t want to take on the booking from someone you know, there are a few options.<\/p>\n<p>The first one is to simply ignore the message. It\u2019s not abnormal to ghost unwanted escort requests, and your silence will let them know it\u2019s a no. However, some punters might decide to keep messaging, which might become unpleasant and angry.<\/p>\n<p>To avoid angry messages, it\u2019s sometimes a good idea to send a polite rejection. You might want to say you\u2019re not taking bookings at this time or not working for the foreseeable future. This way, you\u2019re providing a neutral excuse that skips around the topic of knowing each other.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/when-a-client-wont-back-off\/\">If a client won\u2019t back off<\/a>, you\u2019ll need to set a boundary and say you\u2019re not taking their booking. After you\u2019ve clarified that, stop replying to their messages, and they should leave you alone. You may also want to block them from contacting you again.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"ifyouwanttogoforit\"><strong>What to do if you want to go for it<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>Do you have a good feeling about the message request? Don\u2019t think you have to block someone straight away.<\/p>\n<p>While the general consensus is not to book people you know, it\u2019s not always that simple. They might be an old acquaintance, and maybe there used to be chemistry between you. If you don\u2019t have a bad feeling about the situation and are okay with them knowing you\u2019re an escort, it\u2019s not as cut and dry.<\/p>\n<p>However, you must still treat the interaction like any <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/benefits-of-being-an-escorts-regular-client\/\">normal client<\/a>. Be aware that they might ask for discounts because you know each other.<\/p>\n<p>Don\u2019t give them any discounts or free sessions because you know each other &#8211; this reduces your credibility as a service provider. Instead, you must use the same tone of voice and provide the same <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/how-to-decide-what-services-to-offer-as-a-sex-worker\/\">service options<\/a> as usual.<\/p>\n<p>Also, remember, you can say no and back out at any point. If you book someone you know and change your mind before the day, you can still cancel the meeting. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/a-z-sexual-consent-in-sex-work\/\">Consent is critical<\/a>!<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-5008\" src=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-2.png\" alt=\"couple in a restaurant drinking wine and lovingly looking at each other\" width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-2.png 1080w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-2-300x169.png 300w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-2-1024x576.png 1024w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-2-768x432.png 768w, https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/what-to-do-if-someone-you-know-books-an-escort-session-2-600x338.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/p>\n<h2 id=\"whatiftheysubscribetoyouronlyfans\"><strong>What if someone you know subscribes to your OnlyFans<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>Perhaps you\u2019re not an escort but have an <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/things-you-need-to-know-when-creating-an-onlyfans\/\">Only Fans<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/webcamming-vs-pornography\/\">webcam show<\/a>. A similar issue is when someone you know tries to subscribe to your platform. While you won\u2019t meet in person, it can still be awkward, and you might not feel comfortable with people you know outside of work seeing your content.<\/p>\n<p>Some sex workers are relaxed about people they know seeing their professional work. There\u2019s always a risk of someone finding out what you do or seeing the material. However, you still have the right to block or remove people from your subscription list.<\/p>\n<p>So, if you don\u2019t feel comfortable, block or remove the follower. You don\u2019t need to message them or contact them off the platform. Out of sight, out of mind!<\/p>\n<p>If this happens, it\u2019s worth considering how comfortable you are with the profession. While you can use an alias and hide your face, the chance of someone finding your content is never impossible.<\/p>\n<h2 id=\"thetakeaway\"><strong>The takeaway<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>It\u2019s always strange when your personal and work life collides. But it doesn\u2019t have to be a disaster. Hopefully, this blog has helped you work out the next steps to take and whether you want to make the booking or not. Remember, you never have to do anything you\u2019re uncomfortable with.<\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/for-sex-workers\/\">Learn more about sex work and how to build a business online here<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It\u2019s exciting when a booking message appears in your inbox. But this excitement can quickly turn sour if you know the person from your \u201cvanilla life\u201d. Today, we\u2019re exploring what you should do if someone you know tries to book an escort session. From navigating a rejection with grace to setting firm boundaries, we\u2019re looking [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":5010,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":true,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"CBBTypography":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[217,221],"tags":[],"yst_prominent_words":[],"class_list":["post-5006","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-for-sex-workers","category-sex-work-101"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5006","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5006"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5006\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5010"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5006"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5006"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5006"},{"taxonomy":"yst_prominent_words","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vivastreet.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/yst_prominent_words?post=5006"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}