Two fancily dressed woman having erotic fun on bed at swingers party

Want to try swinging? Here’s how to get the party started

So, you’re interested in swinging? Lucky for you, it’s more common than you think.

According to our own data, swinging was one of the most searched fetishes in the UK.

Likewise, a past survey revealed that almost 1.5 million Brits have tried swinging, while 9 million UK adults are keen to give it a try.

If you’re a first-time swinger and looking to spice up your sex life, read our guide on swinging for the best experience.

What is a swinger?

Swingers are singles or couples in an open relationship who engage in group sex or the swapping of sexual partners. 

They can be married or in a long-term relationship, and enjoy having sex with other people to fulfil their sexual desires and fetishes. 

Unlike polyamorists, they tend to avoid romantic attachments with partners outside of their relationship, keeping relationships strictly sexual.

The sexual practice of swinging can occur in private settings or in dedicated public places, such as swinger parties like Swinging Heaven (more information below).


Three swingers clinking glasses at a party

Reasons why people swing

Non-monogamous relationships might not be traditional, but there are various reasons why people think it’s a beneficial choice for themselves and their relationship. 

Below are some reasons why people enjoy swinging:

  • It reinvigorates their sex life  
  • It allows them to explore their sexuality, such as being bisexual 
  • It gives them a chance to fulfil their sexual kinks, such as voyeurism or threesome sex
  • They don’t want to stay in a committed relationship while being sexually free
  • They believe sex is more physical than emotional for them and can be separate from relationships  
  • They have a different sex drive to their partner
  • Their partner is unable to satisfy them sexually in the bedroom
  • The thrill of competition and a bit of jealousy turns them on

Five pairs of feet in a bed symbolising swinging and group sex

How to become a swinger

If you want to become a swinger, there are a few things to consider to ensure it goes smoothly for you and your relationship. Firstly, you should:

Talk to your partner and establish consent

Although this might be a little never-racking, let your partner know that you’re interested in swinging and ask them if they would be up to it too. 

Be sure to explain to them why you think it will be beneficial to both of you, so they understand your feelings instead of leaving them to their own assumptions.

Set the boundaries with your partner

Once you and your partner have agreed to become swingers, you need to set boundaries to ensure that you both agree with how this will be done and to avoid complications in your relationship. 

For example, you might want to think about how often you will swing, sexual activities that are off the table, what you’re happy or not happy witnessing with outside partners, safe sex measures and hygiene practices, and so on.

Start your search for other swingers

After you’re both clear on the boundaries and each other’s expectations, you can start your search for other swingers, whether it be online, at events, or with people you already know. 

Some swingers even opt to hire an escort to indulge in group sex, watch their partner have sex, or feel like they are swinging.

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Tips on how to swing 

When it comes to swinging, there is some basic etiquette you should be aware of to swing safely and consider other people’s expectations. These include;

  • Approaching other swingers politely and respectfully
  • Asking them for consent and explaining what your boundaries are and asking them theirs
  • Making sure you have washed before and after engaging in sexual intercourse
  • Using contraception, such as condoms, to protect you and your partner’s sexual health
  • Avoiding talking about their partner, as this can be quite sensitive for them
  • Refraining from asking if you’re better in bed than their partner
  • Respecting your partner by not complaining about them, whether it be regarding their personal traits or their prowess in the bedroom
  • Being mindful of leaving your partner for too long, especially if they are not engaging with anyone
  • Being fair and considerate by not insisting on swinging with a couple if your partner does not fancy their potential swinger

Swinging couple being sexually intimate on bed

What is a swingers club or party?

A swingers club or party is a social and public place for swingers to go to meet other compatible swingers and fulfil their fantasies.

Although each couple may have different motivations, it’s a place for swingers to feel free and be adventurous without judgement or stigma, as everyone is there for the same reasons.

Here are some 9 things to expect at a swingers club:

  1. People like to talk, dance, flirt and relax before the sexual activity begins
  2. Consent is key at there is usually a strong code of conduct, whereby people respect and understand that others may not be interested in their advances  
  3. There is sometimes a warm-up game, such as spin the bottle, to get people in the mood for swinging
  4. Swingers clubs can provide playrooms (including private spaces), bathrooms, and necessities such as towels, soaps, lubricants and condoms
  5. People generally come prepared with their own protection for their sexual safety
  6. Couples attend the swingers party as a couple and leave as a couple
  7. People are likely to be walking around in underwear  
  8. Sometimes, people can be seen engaging in sexual activity  
  9. You can make lifelong friends with benefits, perfect for meeting up in the future for more swinging activity

People drinking and having fun at swingers party

Although the main purpose of swinger parties is to swap partners, you are not obligated to do this.

If you’re new to the swinging world, there’s nothing wrong with taking in the atmosphere and being observant to get a feel of what it’s about.

However, try not to do this too often, as you might appear like you’re just there to snoop and people watch – so only go if you’re really up for it.

Where can I meet swingers?

If you or your partner are interested in swinging, there are various places you can meet like-minded people.

As mentioned previously, if you like a lively environment or a bit of social fun, you can meet swingers at swinger parties, clubs and houses. Some popular swinging locations in the UK are:

  • Our Place 4 Fun
  • Club Rub
  • Hellfire Club
  • Xtasia
  • The Private Club
  • Klub Verboten

However, there are other places to look for local swingers, such as adult and swinger dating sites and apps, such as:

  • Swinging Heaven
  • Adult Friend Finder
  • SwapFinder
  • Swing Lifestyle
  • Swinger Social
  • Swinger Towns
  • 3way
  • 3Fun
  • 3Hook

If you’re keen on going out, you can even meet swingers online and arrange to meet up at a swingers club.


Man and woman being intimate on sofa at swingers party

How to find local swingers on Vivastreet

Another great place to find UK swingers is on Vivastreet. Whether you are looking for swingers in London or local swingers, you can do this on our platform in three easy steps: 

  1. Visit our Swingers page – Here you will find over 5,000 swingers
  2. Search through the ads Swingers will provide a personal profile describing themselves and their interests
  3. Contact the swinger – Once you’ve found a suitable swinger, you can contact them and arrange a meetup

If you want to, you can refine your search by location, orientation, and sexual interests.

You can also enter a term in the search bar that describes something you’re interested in exploring, such as oral sex and browse through the search results.

Post your own ad:

If you want to increase your chances of finding compatible swingers, you can post your own ad to advertise your interests.

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