nervous man trying to relax when meeting an escort for the first time

How to relax when meeting an escort for the first time

Arranging an escorting session is a thrilling feeling. You’ve found an escort you match with, swapped some flirty texts, and now it’s time to meet in real life. Everything is looking up!

Though the prospect of a steamy session is exciting, many clients also feel nervous before the big day. This is especially true if it’s their first time meeting an escort. However, nerves shouldn’t ruin your experience. And we’re here to help you conquer your worries.

Keep reading to learn the top tips on how to relax when meeting an escort.

Is it normal to feel nervous before meeting an escort?

Feeling anxious before meeting an escort is normal; nearly all clients experience this feeling. It’s standard to have butterflies in your stomach, even if it’s not your first session. But it’s essential to overcome these nerves before arriving. This way, you can relax, connect with your escort, and enjoy the session.

Escorts often anticipate their clients will be nervous, too. Many even have strategies to help you get comfortable and relax in the session. For example, some have small talk prepped to break the ice. Others will suggest a sensual massage to help you physically relax. So, don’t worry. Professional escorts are there to help you chill out.

How to prepare to meet an escort

Before we jump into the best ways to calm your mind, we also want to stress the importance of physically preparing to meet an escort. When you feel prepared, you feel more confident. So, make sure you get yourself ready in time for your session.

Use these tips as a checklist for your next escort session:

  • Have a good shower and perfect your personal hygiene
  • Ensure you have condoms and lube
  • Dress in flattering clothes
  • Arrange a meeting in a risk-free setting

Though simple, ensuring these boxes are ticked will leave you feeling more chilled out before the session. Learn more about how to prepare to meet an escort here.

Top tips for reducing anxiety before meeting an escort

Feeling a bit worried? Here are some popular tips for de-stressing before meeting an escort.


Mindfulness is a term used a lot these days, and it’s easy to discard it as nonsense. However, science-backed studies have shown that practising mindfulness can help to manage and reduce stress, anxiety, and depression.

Simply taking a few minutes to count some deep breaths or focus on your senses can bring you out of your worries and into the present moment. This, in turn, lowers your stress, helping you relax before your session.

nervous couple in bed

Workout on the day

Another way to reduce stress is by getting a workout in on the session day.

When you work out, endorphins are released. These helpful chemicals interact with your brain’s pain receptors and trigger positive feelings in your body. They can also act as healthy sedatives that boost self-esteem, reduce stress, improve sleep, and diminish anxiety.

So, not only will a workout help you prepare your physical fitness, but it’ll help your mental health, too.

Arrive early

Though the prospect of waiting might not seem fun, being early is a great way to reduce any extra stress.

We’re not talking about arriving hours early. No, no. Simply arriving 15 minutes before the session time is perfect. This gives you a buffer time in case your transport is delayed and allows you to collect yourself before the meeting.

Plus, being late is a sure way to give the wrong impression to your escort.

Eat a balanced meal

This advice might seem extra obvious. Nonetheless, it’s vital. A balanced and nourishing meal sets you up for feeling your best and decreasing anxiety.

If you want to ensure you’re feeling zen, opt for foods naturally rich in magnesium. Harvard Health has found these help reduce anxiety and increase feelings of calmness.

Magnesium-rich foods include:

  • Spinach
  • Swiss chard
  • Leafy greens
  • Legumes
  • Nuts
  • Seeds
  • Whole grains

You never know. A healthy salad beforehand might help you ease the situation more than expected.

Read other people’s experiences

Another powerful strategy for lowering nerves is reading other people’s escort experiences.

The internet is home to a wealth of information, including first-hand accounts of escort experiences from client and sex worker perspectives. These tales are ideal for settling anxieties, as they outline what to expect from your session.

They also show that nearly all escorts and clients also feel nervous before sessions. So, if you’re feeling on edge, you’re not alone.

r/SexWorkers on Reddit is home to many discussions, including “Advice For Clients With Social Anxiety”. Have a browse before leaving the house.

close up of a man working out in the gym

Define your boundaries

Nervousness often comes from fear of the unknown. To combat this, you can define your boundaries and create a roadmap of expectations for the session.

This could include:

  • Where you want to be touched
  • What do you want the session to include
  • If you wish to take your clothes off

Creating boundaries keeps you and the escort safe, so take some time to clarify what you are uncomfortable with. The escort will also have their own boundaries, and you must respect them.

Remind yourself of the misconceptions

Hiring an escort comes with endless misconceptions, and some of these myths might cause extra anxiety in some clients. Understanding that misconceptions are false can help you relax before a session, so spend some time researching common myths about escorting.

Check out our complete guide to common misconceptions about hiring an escort to get a step ahead of the game.

Check in with your escort

Finally, checking in with your escort can help with your nerves if you’re feeling worried on the day. A simple message like “Hey, are we still on for this time?” can reaffirm that the session is professional and still happening.

Of course, you should avoid sending a barrage of messages and respect your sex worker’s boundaries. Remember, they might also be nervous, and 100 messages might make them feel more anxious.

You can even explain that you’re feeling nervous. Escorts have likely had conversions about these feelings before, and they can take extra steps to accommodate your needs. Honesty is always the best policy.

Worried you’ll get something wrong? See the most common mistakes clients make when hiring an escort here.

The takeaway

Feeling nervous is a part of life we all experience. Luckily, there are some steps we can take to reduce our worries and enjoy the moment — especially when it’s a sexy one. Hopefully, these tips have helped you prepare for your session. Always remember to respect your escort’s boundaries and ensure enthusiastic consent is on the table.

Learn more about being a client and hiring an escort today from our sex-positive blog.

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