black couple making love in bed

What is a praise kink and do I have one?

Praising someone for a job well done is a common act of kindness, but there’s something extra special about praising someone in the bedroom. While praise kinks have got increasingly more common recently, understanding them is still not straightforward, and for a good reason – are kinksters turned on with praises only?

Well, there’s much more to a praise kink than just giving compliments or admiring your partner, and we’ll go deeper into the topic in this complete guide.

What is a praise kink?

Praise kink is a sexual fetish where the submissive or bottom partner enjoys receiving compliments or positive feedback in the bedroom. While not everyone who identifies as a praise kinkster enjoys getting compliments during sex, it’s an exciting and unique way to add an extra layer of pleasure for both partners.

It’s not an easy kink to understand, as receiving compliments should be part of every romantic relationship, and you might think this is all too much or over the top. However, if you think about it, it’s similar to pretty much any kink – BDSM, cuckolding, or other fetishes.

The psychology of praise kink

People who enjoy praise kinks may find pleasure in being praised and hearing others acknowledge their accomplishments. It’s the same feeling as receiving normal compliments, but with a sexual boost.

The compliments could be about anything, depending on the person. From praising their body to complimenting how you had sex with them or how they’re just perfect. It’s important to note that praise kinkers are normally perfectionists or thrive on being perfect, and as their partner, you can see where they’re trying hard to succeed.

For this reason, as the compliment giver, you will want to give compliments based on their target – getting a fitter butt (I love your butt, it’s perfect), being more muscular (your muscles drive me crazy!).

Some people find the feeling of being admired sexually arousing, while others simply enjoy the sense of connection that comes with genuine appreciation.


man get closer admiring girlfriend almost kissing having sex foreplay

How do I know if I have a praise kink?

We went through the essential details of a praise kink, so, naturally, you might wonder if you have one. Surely enough, everyone likes to receive compliments, so it can be a fetish difficult to differentiate from normal behaviours.

But what you need to consider is if you feel sexually aroused when your partner or someone compliments you. Do you have shivers when your partner gives you a compliment? Or do you feel excited when your partner says how perfect you are?

If that’s the case, you may just have a praise kink, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Rather, it will be easy for your partner to attract you sexually, making the relationship even healthier.

Praise kink phrases you can use

If you’re looking to add a little spice to your sex life, why not try using kink phrases? Kink phrases can add an extra layer of excitement and intensity to your sex life, and they can be a fun way to experiment with different sexual fantasies and role-playing types.

Here are some examples of kink phrases you can use:

  • I’m so proud of you
  • I can’t stop thinking about your smile
  • Your kisses always turn me on
  • Your body drives me wild
  • You always know what I want
  • Thank you for the perfect sex
  • I love when you s@ck me
  • You listen well; I love it
  • You smell incredible
  • No one can beat you; you’re the best
  • Everyone is jealous of me, you’re perfect
  • That’s my boy/girl
  • You’re so big
  • I want to taste you
  • I need you inside me
  • You feel so good inside me
  • You’re so beautiful
  • You have no idea how good that feels

As you can see, while some compliments are great to give in the bedroom, it’s not always about sex, and it’s exactly what a praise kink is about.

How to get the most out of praise kink?

Perhaps you’ve tried out praise kink a few times, and now you desire to bring a few kinks up to speed and explore more of it with your partner. To start with, like most things in life, communication is important. Discuss with your partner what you like and don’t enjoy giving or receiving; this will open the doors to a whole new experience. Keep in mind that a non-positive praise kink phrase that may sound like a good thing to you may not be one for your partner.

Also, in order to know how to fully please your partner, it may be beneficial to understand why your partner doesn’t like certain praise. This will allow you not to ask every single sentence they like or don’t and come up with your own, making them feel even more special.

Of course, you want to use words and compliments that your partner likes. But variety is the essence of life, so you don’t want to do the same thing all the time, and you don’t want to become monotonous.

Lastly, be genuine in your praises. If you’re not feeling it, your partner will be able to tell, and it won’t feel as good for either of you.


boyfriend admiring young girlfriend praise in the bedroom

Is there a risk associated with praise kink?

While there is no research specifically on the risk associated with praise kinks, it’s possible that there may be some associated with it, for instance, the following.

Replacing daily compliments for only sex-related ones

Compliments must be part of any romantic relationship, and there shouldn’t always be a sexual target as a result. You should still say compliments like “You look good today”, “I love your smell”, or “I miss you, can’t wait to see you”, and not skip them just because your partner has a praise kink.

Praises should be genuine

A praise kink can be damaging for both the receiving partner and the relationship if the compliments aren’t genuine, as it could seem that you say them just to please your partner, but you don’t actually feel them. Even worse, the submissive partner could think that you’re patronising them. The same goes with giving too many compliments, as it won’t feel genuine anymore and do more harm than good.

The top partner could try a few compliments to see the submissive partner’s limits and know how to regulate the number of compliments. Naturally, in private moments, more compliments are expected than outside the bedroom.

Do not confuse praise with therapy

Praise, in itself, does not improve self-esteem and isn’t, in any way, a form of therapy, no matter how much the submissive partner like compliments. As a matter of fact, in the long term, if the top partner does not compliment you anymore or less often, it could damage you. For this reason, if you have self-esteem issues, you will want to address them to a therapist rather than expecting compliments.

Be genuine

All in all, praise kinks are a fun way to express your love for someone. We hope you found this information helpful and that it has inspired you to experiment with new ways of expressing your love for your partner. Remember, the key is to be creative, open-minded, and communicative with each other as you explore these new pleasures.

In conclusion, a praise kink is a fun and flirty way to make compliments in and out of the bedroom. If you want to try it out, be sure to use genuine compliments and positive reinforcement as the foundation of your interactions.

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