woman dominating a man with a whip

Everything to keep in mind when exploring kinks and fetishes

Anyone who says sex is boring has clearly never explored their kinks and fetishes. Whether you like to get tied up, spanked, or role-play as your favourite character, exploring your sexual desires can be a fun and exciting way to spice up your and your partner’s sex life.

However, it’s necessary to always practice safe and consensual kink play. Before you try anything new, discuss your limits and boundaries with your partner. Make sure you have a safe word that you can use if things start to get too intense.

Of course, there is more, and we will cover everything you have to know before exploring your kinks and fetishes in the bedroom.

The benefits of exploring your kinks and fetishes

Kinks and fetishes are often seen as taboo, but exploring them has many benefits. For one, they can add some spice to your sex life. Trying new things can help to keep things exciting, and kinks and fetishes offer a whole world of new possibilities.

They can also help you to feel more sexually confident and adventurous. In addition, kinks and fetishes can deepen the connection between you and your partner. Exploring them together can create a deeper sense of intimacy and trust. So much that the most popular fetishes in the UK were BDSM, dogging, and anal sex.

Last but not least, kinks and fetishes can be a lot of fun. Whether you’re enjoying the thrill of trying something new or simply indulging in a fantasy, they can add some extra excitement to the bed.

How do I learn about my own kinks?

The first step is acknowledging that you have kinks. For some people, this is an easy task. They’ve known what turns them on since they were old enough to masturbate. For others, it can be a more difficult realisation.

Maybe you’ve always known that you’re interested in something a little out of the ordinary but weren’t sure what it was or how to explore it further. Or maybe you’ve never really thought about your sexual preferences before and are just now starting to realise that there’s more to sex than just vanilla missionary.

Regardless of where you fall on the spectrum, the important thing is that you’re taking the time to learn about what turns you on.

There are a few different ways that you can go about learning more about your kinks and fetishes. The first is to simply do some research on your own by reading erotic stories or watching adult movies that feature activities that could potentially interest you.

Apart from that, you could also check social media such as Instagram or Twitter and see if any post could trigger you. Alternatively, Fetlife is a platform that was created specifically to discuss and discover kinks and fetishes, and you should certainly give it a shot.

Finally, you could also hire an escort on Vivastreet. In fact, escorting is legal in the UK and, therefore, it is an excellent opportunity to meet up with a professional and get to know what arouses you.


submissive girl in leather handcuffs lying on a white sheet in the bedroom


How to tell your partner?

If you’re lucky enough to have found an open-minded partner in the bedroom, you may want to consider revealing your fetish. Of course, this is a delicate topic, and you’ll need to carefully approach the conversation.

The best way to start is by simply telling your partner that you have a particular desire or interest. You can then explain what this entails, being as specific or vague as you feel comfortable starting with.

You can enjoy a richer and more fulfilling sexual relationship with communication and mutual respect. It’s essential to be honest about your feelings and desires, as this will help to build trust and intimacy between you and your partner. If your partner is receptive, you can explore your fetish together safely and consensually.

In case your partner isn’t initially understanding your fetish or isn’t as open-minded as you’d like to, give them time, and they may eventually get it and maybe even try.

What if you have a kink/fetish and your partner doesn’t?

It can be challenging to know how to approach the topic if you have a kink or fetish and your partner doesn’t share your interest. After all, you don’t want to hurt your partner’s feelings or make them feel uncomfortable. However, there are ways to bring up the topic in a way that is respectful and informative.

To start with, try to educate yourself about your kink or fetish. This way, you will be able to talk about it with your partner in an informed and respectful way. Also, be open and honest with your partner about your interests. Explain why you find the kink or fetish exciting, and be sure to listen to their concerns.

Finally, be willing to compromise. If your partner is not interested in exploring your kink or fetish, be willing to find other ways to express your sexuality. By subtly approaching the topic, you can find a way to share your interests with your partner without making them feel uncomfortable.

What if your partner has a kink/fetish and you don’t?

It’s not uncommon for people to be intrigued by their partner’s kinks and fetishes. After all, there’s something exciting about exploring uncharted territory together. However, feeling a bit apprehensive about trying something new is also perfectly normal. 

If you’re unsure whether you’re ready to venture into the world of kink, talk about what your partner is interested in and why they find it appealing. 

This will help you understand their perspective and make an informed decision about whether or not you want to try it. It’s also important to remember that you don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with.

If you decide to try it, start slow and build up to anything that might be outside your comfort zone. Lastly, remember that experimentation can be fun. Approach it with an open mind and a sense of adventure, and you’re sure to enjoy yourself.


couple playing sexual games woman sucking on man's finger


Does it always have to involve sex?

A fetish is defined as “an abnormal or obsessive preoccupation with a particular object, activity, or body part”. It’s often seen as something sexual in nature, but that’s not always the case.

Some people have purely aesthetic fetishes, such as an obsession with perfect skin or a specific type of clothing. Others might have a fixation on certain behaviour, like hair-pulling or toe sucking.

When we think of the word “fetish”, we often associate it with something sexual. However, a fetish can be much more than that; let’s elaborate on this. 


A fetish is commonly understood to be an object or body part that one is sexually attracted to. However, a closer look reveals that fetishes are much more complex than this simple definition. At their heart, kinks are about communication. To have a fetish is to communicate a deep desire or need. It is to say, “This is what turns me on”. And crucially, it is also to invite a response.

A fetish is not simply a personal quirk; it is a way of reaching out and making a connection with another person. In this way, fetishes can be seen as an erotic language, a form of expressing the self and connecting with others on a deep level.


Other than communication, trust is another important aspect of fetishes. Because fetishes can be so specific, they often require a high degree of trust between partners. In order to safely explore a fetish, both parties need to be on the same page regarding boundaries and expectations.

Without a solid trust base, it’s all too easy for someone to cross a line and cause hurt or damage. When both partners are open and honest about their desires, however, fetishes can be a fun and exciting way to add excitement to any relationship.


Many times, sexual fetishes are simply intriguing and arousing interests that we enjoy with consenting partners who share our affection for the objects, activities, or situations. Fetishism can be a fun, creative way to add excitement to our sexual repertoire.

In addition, kinks and fetishes are all about consent – you must be consensual when pleasing your partner’s fetish. Conversely, you will want your other half to accept your fetish to enjoy the experience fully. After all, it all wouldn’t be so pleasurable if your partner didn’t actually like it.


When it comes to kinks or fetishes, it is important not to be judgemental with your partner. Everyone has their own unique desires and needs, and respecting each other’s choices shouldn’t be an option. Judgment should be left at the door, whether it is something as simple as a lingerie fetish or something more complicated, such as pegging.

Acceptance and open-mindedness are key in any relationship, and this also applies to fetishes. If you are able to appreciate and understand your partner’s fetishes, then you will have a stronger and more fulfilling relationship. Plus, who doesn’t love a little bit of kink in their life?

There’s something exceptional about fetishes. They bring together all of the things that make us human – communication, trust, consent and non-judgement, and this is why they are positive for a healthy relationship.

Continue exploring

In conclusion, exploring your sexuality and fetishes is essential to having a fulfilling and enjoyable sexual life. By communicating your desires to your partner, you can ensure that both of you are on the same page and that you are both comfortable and satisfied with the sexual activity taking place. 

Ultimately, remember that everyone has different preferences regarding sex, so there is no “right way” to do things. The most important thing is to respect each other’s needs and desires and have fun.

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