woman wearing a collar holding a butt plug

Is wearing a collar a kink or a fashion statement?

Have you ever fantasised about wearing a collar while playing with your partner? Collars are a hot accessory that can help you dip your toes into the BDSM world and allow you to show your complete submission to your partner.

Find out everything you need to know about these kinky necklaces below.

Can you have a collar kink?

Ever wondered whether a collar is a sexual kink? Well, you’re right! Alongside being an excellent accessory, collars are a turn-on and kink. They can also indicate power dynamics within the BDSM community.

Some people wear them to spice up kinky sex, and others wear them daily to show the world their commitment to their dominance. There’s no one right way to play with collars, but they’re a popular kink worldwide.

If you’ve noticed that your attention is drawn to collars, experimenting with this accessory could be for you — and we’re here to help you understand what they represent.

Can collars be fashion statements?

Though collars are usually associated with the BDSM community and kinks, they can be worn as fashion statements. After all, collars can perfect an alternative look, and you can buy them in all colours and materials these days. Many choker necklaces also look like collars. So, you can get super creative with your style.

However, it’s vital to note that wearing a collar might make people ask questions about whether you’re into kink or the BDSM scene. For many collar wearers, these judgements are cool. But it might make others uncomfortable.

How are collars related to BDSM?

In BDSM, collars can represent power dynamics between a dominant and submissive partner. The submissive usually wears them to show their commitment and submission to the dominant. This is usually only in the bedroom, but a small subset of submissives wear their collar every day in non-sexual situations.

The meaning behind BDSM collars

Collars are not always about possession. However, they can be for some couples. Wearing a collar generally shows a submissive’s dedication and trust for their dominant. In some ways, they’re similar to wedding rings. The collar shows a mutual agreement that both partners have consented to. It’s more of an agreement than ownership.

bdsm toys including collars and butt plugs laid out on a satin cover

Different types of BDSM collars

Collars go around your neck, and the traditional type is black and made from leather. But as designers get more creative, many different styles are popping up. Here are the main types to know:

Standard collars

Standard collars are the type that usually pops into your mind when you think about collars. These are a few centimetres thick, often black, and might have a few metal studs. As we mentioned, they can be made from leather, but other materials include synthetic fabrics or PVC.

While black is the most popular, you can also buy these in bright colours, pastel hues, and transparent vinyl materials.

Dog collars

Dog collars are very similar to standard collars, but the key difference is that they have a metal D-ring at the front, which allows you to attach a leash. Dominants can clip a leash in and use it to control the submissive. This type of collar is popular within BDSM and pup play.

Metal collars

Metal collars are also available, as some submissives prefer the feel of cool metal against their skin. These collars tend to be made from large links rather than an inflexible chunk of metal. You can find many leather-metal combination collars, perfect if you want the best of both worlds or aren’t ready for a 100% metal collar.

Fabric collars

Collars don’t always have to be tough and uniform. Fabric collars have more style and pattern choices, allowing you to mix your personal style into the statement. Top materials include lace, velvet, and embroidered fabrics.

Locking collars

If you want to show that you trust your partner, a locking collar could be for you. This type of collar fastens with a lock, and your dominant keeps the key. Of course, enthusiastic consent must be given for these collars.

Discreet collars

Sometimes, a submissive might embrace a traditional collar at home but swap it for a discreet collar for everyday wear. Discreet collars look like ordinary necklaces but have a deeper meaning to the wearer. While they don’t have to look a certain way, most discreet collars are made from silver metal and feature a circular ring (O-ring) in the middle.

Discreet collars are also known as day collars. So, note that down if you’re about to go shopping!

Wrist, ankle & waist collars

The last type of collar on our list differs slightly from the options above. Neck collars are the most popular option for BDSM play. But you can spice it up with added wrist, ankle, and waist restraints. These often look similar to a neck collar but are specially designed for other body parts.

How do you know which collar is suitable for you?

If you’re drawn to collars but don’t know where to start, looking at the endless collar options can be overwhelming. The best way to find the collar for you is through experimentation and research.

Take time to look at all the options, and order some affordable options to try them on. Wearing a collar is a tactile experience – the feel of the material matters a lot. You might like the idea of a metal collar, but wearing it might not be super comfortable. Likewise, a fabric collar might work for you if you want a unique design or feminine edge.

bdsm toys including collars and butt plugs laid out on a satin cover

When should you wear a collar?

There are lots of different times and places to wear BDSM collars. These include:

You can also wear a collar 24/7 in a non-stop BDSM dynamic. However, wearing discreet collars is best when out in public or at work.

Where can you buy BDSM collars?

You can purchase BDSM collars from lots of online stores, but your best bet is an established kink or sex shop. Opt for brands with a good reputation and positive reviews, as these collars will be tested, more comfortable, and made from safe materials.

Collars can also be found from independent retailers on websites like Etsy. Some even purchase collars from pet shops, which isn’t recommended as they’re not made for human wear.

The takeaway

Whether you’re ready to dive into the world of collars or simply curious about what they mean, we hope this article has broadened your perspective. Next time you see someone with a dainty O-ring necklace, remember that it might have a deeper meaning than expected!

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