Women lying in bed holding sheets ready to climax

Edging sex: A guide to orgasm control

Did you know that 95% percent of men report having orgasms during sex compared to only 65% percent of women? 

Since men tend to have orgasms more easily, this means many women often feel disappointed when they don’t get the chance to climax during sex. Likewise, this can also lead many men to feel ashamed that they can’t please their significant other.

Thankfully, a simple technique to control orgasms known as edging might be the perfect solution, to combat the so-called orgasm gap.

What is edging (orgasm control)?

Edging is a technique for controlling orgasms. It involves getting close to orgasm and then ending stimulation for several moments before starting to have sex again.

People choose to use the edging technique when they want sex to last for longer. It also helps people to have orgasms that are more intense. 

Most people who use the edging technique choose to bring themselves and their partners close to orgasm repeatedly without actually having one. Their eventual orgasms tend to be incredibly powerful.

Woman lying on bed with white sheets having an orgasm

If you want to learn how to use this technique during sex, you should first explore edging through masturbation

By doing this, you’ll start understanding your body in deeper ways. You’ll learn to become more in touch with what you’re feeling and will learn to recognise when to stop stimulating yourself to keep from having an orgasm. 

You’ll eventually start having more control over when and how you climax. It will also help you to stay focused in the present moment instead of letting your mind wander.

Benefits of edging

There are many benefits to edging that extend beyond the walls of your bedroom. Those who practice edging develop more self-awareness and self-control. Here are some of the top reasons why to practice edging.

It will become easier for you to have an orgasm

When you edge by yourself you’ll get the chance to connect with your own body. This will help you understand what it needs to climax and how to be more present with your experience while having orgasms.

You’ll develop more sexual stamina

According to a recent study, men last just over five minutes while having sex while women usually last for up to thirteen minutes. This means that women tend to last three times longer than men while having sex.

Partners who want to synchronise with one another can use edging to start having orgasms together. This is because it will help men to improve their stamina.

There is a certain part of the technique known as “start/stop” which will help men and women to have longer-lasting lovemaking sessions.

Your orgasms will become more intense

By using edging to control your climaxes you’ll have more intense orgasms. The pleasure you experience during sex will also last for longer.

Couples who practice edging will also be less likely to cheat on one another because they’ll both be getting their needs met while they’re in bed together.

Edging will help you become more self-aware

To be successful with edging you need to be aware of what your body is doing and what it’s feeling. Just like meditation, edging can help you to be more present with your experience.

People who use edging report that they have more confidence in their bodies. It also becomes easier for couples to develop deep emotional connections that are grounded in mindfulness and self-awareness.

How to edge during sex

Even though many people have never heard of edging before, it’s a technique that’s been around for many years. This is why there are various tried and tested techniques to work with. Here are some of the best ways to practice edging.

1. The start-stop technique

This is a perfect technique for men who struggle with premature ejaculation. You can practice this method by stopping from pleasuring yourself when you feel you’re on the brink of having an orgasm. After a few seconds pass, you can start stroking yourself again. 

This technique works because it holds people back from giving in to the body’s urge to have an orgasm. It instead teases the senses. Over time you’ll be able to lengthen the amount of time that you’re being stimulated. 

The start-stop technique is a subtle process that involves getting close to orgasm without letting yourself tumble off the edge into total pleasure.

Try working with edging when you are at the peak of your excitement. You can then move your hands or toy away from yourself when you feel that you’re getting close to your edge.

This is an ideal technique to practice when you’re having morning sex because people tend to be more in touch with their bodies shortly after they’ve woken up. 

2. Try the squeeze technique

If you are very sensitive, it might take longer than a couple of seconds to delay your orgasm. If this is the case, try using the squeeze technique along with the start-stop technique. 

To use the squeeze technique, all you need to do is squeeze the head of the penis after you’ve reached your edge and have stopped stimulation. Try doing this for about thirty seconds before you resume stimulation. 

Chances are that you’re going to need to practice to stop yourself for this long. This is why it’s a good idea to perform the squeeze technique for a shorter period of time when you’re still familiarizing yourself with the technique. 

If you’re wondering how to edge for hours, this is an ideal technique to work with. You’ll see huge benefits if you stick with it on a consistent basis. 

3. The diversion method

This technique is simple. When you’re on the verge of reaching orgasm, stop stimulating your penis or vagina and start caressing a different part of the body.

If you’re a woman who’s wondering how to edge a man, consider moving from caressing your partner’s penis and to instead run your fingers along their thighs or across their back.

Side effects of edging

If you’re concerned that edging will harm you, don’t worry. There is no evidence that edging has any lasting effects.

On rare occasions, some men report experiencing epididymal hypertension, also known as “blue balls.” Those who suffer from this condition experience pain in their testicles after being aroused and not reaching orgasm. Fortunately, it quickly passes and has no lasting health consequences. 

Many people also incorrectly blame edging for their ejaculation problems. They say that it causes retrograde ejaculation or weak ejaculation. The truth is that these issues are caused by psychological or emotional issues, not because of edging. 

You should also know that edging does not cause erectile dysfunction. This condition develops mainly because of physiological issues that develop when men get older.

Knowing how long edging should last 

It’s up to you how long to wait before letting yourself have an orgasm. You can also experiment with different lengths of time every time you try edging.

The only thing to keep in mind is that edging is a practice that’s about keeping a balance and having control. This means that you need to learn how to know when to stop and when to return to your sexual explorations.

Woman and man in bed during sex

It’s easier to know how long edging should last when you’re alone. When you’re with a partner, it’s important to communicate to find out when your partner is ready to have an orgasm. If you’re both on the same page about when to have an orgasm, it’s probably a sign that you’re in a healthy relationship.

Be aware of half orgasms

People who practice edging sometimes experience half orgasms, also known as disappearing orgasms. These are kinds of orgasms that feel less intense than normal. People who have half orgasms often feel like they’ve missed out on something. 

Even though it can be frustrating to experience a half orgasm, remember to have patience. The practice of edging is an art form that involves developing an intuition for knowing when to allow yourself to have an orgasm and when to wait a little bit longer. 


If you’re interested in having edging sex, there has never been a better time to get started than right now.

You don’t actually need to have a partner to practice edging. All you need to do is push yourself to the edge of having an orgasm before stopping the stimulation. Over time you’ll have more intense orgasms that will be easier to control. 

Do you want to find out more about sexual techniques and practices, as well as how to edge yourself? If so, don’t forget to check out our blog.

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